Le Snowbird — Fiche N°03

Specimen observed in the wilds of Florida and Arizona, November through April. Subject exhibits a seasonal migration pattern triggered by the first frost. Markings: beige shorts, white sneakers, a golf visor worn with unearned confidence. The Snowbird is often heard before it is seen, emitting a distinctive call: 'It's not the heat, it's the humidity.' Behaviour: congregates in buffet lines and RV parks, displays a compulsive need to inform locals that 'back home, we do it better.' Despite the apparent absurdity, the Snowbird is a survival specialist — its ability to navigate a Costco during peak hours is unmatched. Note: subject is not to be confused with the Canadian Goose, which is merely aggressive. The Snowbird is relentless.